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"To which a pedantic (and annoyingly bright) seven-year-old might reply: "What, never! "Shyness may have gotten you into the habit of always waiting for the other person to start the conversation. Actually, it's not so much what you say - within reason - but how you come across when you're saying it.

Tinder's founders bragged to us about the number of female users when it launched last October, and though they didn't have fresh numbers, the app has received a lot of vocal approval from women online, including female tech writer Jenna Wortham, who says "there’s something about Tinder’s simple, flirty interface that is undeniably fun." This acceptance might have something to do with the fact that unlike every other hook-up app out there, which were birthed by men, as Ann Friedman notes in So far hook-up apps haven't catered to women because they lack certain protections that the XX-demographic likes when meeting potential sexual partners, argues Friedman: "women want authenticity, privacy, a more controlled environment, and a quick path to a safe, easy offline meeting." Perhaps because of its single female voice, Tinder offers a lot of those things mostly by way of Facebook.

The app syncs up with the social network in a "cleverly discreet" way, as Wortham puts it.

Privacy: The app accesses all of your Facebook information, something that is "typically a turnoff for people who don’t want to accidentally see the profiles of their colleagues or worry about embarrassing notifications popping up on their Timeline," as Wortham explains But, in exchange for that, it promises not to shamelessly promote itself on your timeline.

A More Controlled Environment: The app only lets people who have mutually liked each other (based mostly on their photo) message each other.

Also, when listening to others speaking, smile (unless they're relating tales of their latest messy divorce). People who worry about not knowing what to say forget that when you communicate with someone else, you have the use of two brains. If you instigate a bonfire by lighting a match, then it burns. Introduce yourself and shake their hand: "Hi, I'm Mark. " Remember, when you approach someone for a chat, it's not just you; it's the two of you. A relative of mine had an almost military style of socially interrogating people. No one likes to be regaled with masses of detail about the car insurance form you filled out that morning (unless you can make it particularly amusing). "If you find something funny (and it's not their appearance), then say so.

The location aspect of the app ensures the person is close-by, making meeting up easy. Again, the mutual Facebook friend thing makes checking out the person's credibility a little easier.

Anecdotally, I've had friends tell me they've met up with people on Tinder in groups at bars, at first. 1.5 billion profiles have been rated or ranked, according to Wortham, it has seen 20,000 downloads since October and has itself a four star rating in the i Tunes store.

To help you feel this relaxed confidence when starting a conversation, check out the free audio session at the bottom of this page. Asking someone about themselves gives them the opportunity to help the conversation get going.

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If you ever feel afraid to start conversations with strangers, put the following ideas into practice and ramp up your conversation-starter self-confidence even with the most dour of people. Start by asking them about themselves as connected to the situation. This is fine as some kind of opener, but the conversation could end there if you don't take heed of the next tip.

Meaning: "No more Ok Cupid troll sending you message after message promising dick pics if you give him your phone number," as NYU Local's Caroline Hayes and Chelsea Beeler put it.

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